And now you know the rest of the story....

The end of Jen's wedding tale:

Scores in Vegas, a lot less entertaining than one might think. Yes the women were hot but it was ridiculously expensive and just not all that phone. Really... I swear.
There was a weird thing where some of the men in our group were basically hitting on some strippers. A stripper talked to me for a while about her life. With no asking for money or if I wanted a lap dance. We finally decide to get out of there and....

In the cab, the cab driver kept asking us if we wanted to go to a brothel. ahhh no.
Though some of the men in the group did. Since it was my job to keep Jen's future husband away from any unnecessarily snatches (or any snatches for that matter) I said no and forced the cab driver to take us home.

Jen's wedding was great. We were supposed to go to some club afterwards and they wouldn't let us in, even though Jen had reservations and was in a wedding dress. Some jerkoff was throwing thousands of dollars around in there so she got bumped for that guy. Annoying. So Jen's brother and I walked to a liquor store, bought two cases of beer and walked back. (looooong walk)

We get to Jen's suite. Everyone's tired. No one wants to party. Here's Chris and I... thinking we saved the day... alas the day... ruined. So Chris and Chrissy (chris' wife) and I walk out to go to our hotel. But we have all this beer. We can't drink it all, waaay too much for three people. So we start handing out beers for free. We were fricking rock stars. Two thug-ass gangstas said we could hang. Some people said we were the best part of their trip. etc.

Oh oh oh I forgot. The Ice Bar Story:
The night Chris got into Vegas, he met us directly at Mandalay Bay. He immediately said we had to go to the Ice Bar. He proceeds to tell us that the Ice Bar is a magical place, a bar so cold that every thing is made of ice. Where they make you wear giant fur coats and russian hats. Where shots of vodka sluce down slopes of mini ice mountains and into your mouth. Where Buddha, Jesus and Vishnu all get smashed with you. Ok not that last part. But everything else.

We go to Red Square, the bar where the Ice Bar is, and proclaim we would like to go to the Ice Bar. We have to buy a bottle of vodka to get in. A bottle of Gray Goose: $5K or something like that... not happening. So we find a really cheap (relatively) bottle and get in. They really did make us wear giant fur coats and Russian hats. I was getting excited. Then we walk inside....

The Ice Bar is actually a tiny room. With a plastic table that looks like ice in the middle. It has old, mansion-style chairs. And it's really fucking cold. No ice mountain. Nothing was made out of ice. No deities. Our server sets out our bottle of cheap vodka. We start doing shots. The vodka is horrible but it is so cold it's hard to tell after a while. We were smashed fairly quickly which was fun. Chris and I stole a Russian hat. We put it in his backpack. We got our server to do two shots with us, even though she said she would get fired for drinking with us. (Jen held her fur coat over the door.)

Our vodka=tapped. Server gets us all together. She says she has to tell us something important. "It's very cold in here. But it's not very cold out there. When you leave, the blood is going to rush to the surface of your skin. It's going to make you extremely drunk, extremely fast. You're going to be light headed. So walk slowly and don't be ashamed to grab the bar for balance on the way out."

We kinda laughed her off. Then Jen's dad walks out. Big tall man. "holy crap!" he shouts and grabs the bar. We all start giggling. And this happens to everyone. Whoa! Grab the bar. Cue giggles. So we get out to the general area and proceed to laugh our asses off. Good times. We grabbed burgers later and I took the tram back to my hotel.

Either way, best part of the wedding trip. I will end here for now but I might have a more current post later today.