The Rear Window Theory

Ok since it's related to the more interesting news as of late, I will explain the Rear Window Theory on relationships.

First, Rear Window is a movie by Alfred Hitchcock released in 1954. It starred Jimmy Stewart and Grace Kelly (::swoon::). Stewart played a photographer for a magazine who is laid up in his apartment with a broken leg. The insurance company sends a nurse to his place every day to make sure he's doing ok. (Kinda funny to think about something like that now) Stewart is dating Lisa Carol Freemont (Grace Kelly). She's a socialite and drop dead gorgeous. She's obviously crazy for Stewart's character.

The plot of the movie surrounds Stewart's character peeping on his neighbors when he
sees one neighbor acting suspiciously. Action ensues. (don't want to ruin the movie)

Anyway, the Rear Window theory is based on something the nurse says to Stewart.

Stella: Look, Mr. Jeffries, I'm not an educated woman, but I can tell you one thing. When a man and woman see each other and like each other, they oughta come together--wham!--like a couple of taxis on Broadway, and not sit around analyzing each other like two specimens in a bottle.

It's so simple! And so true! I've thought a lot about how men and women muck up relationships and/or dating by making it to complicated. You like a girl? Yes. She likes you? Think so. Then say something you idiot! Don't just spend hours on end analyzing all the possible outcomes.

So the theory is essentially keep it simple when it's simple. Don't let irrelevant reasons outside the connection between two people stop you from action. And don't fret so damn much.

Now do I even follow the rule? Hell no. But I'm working on it.

I am a Wicked Child

I'm now officially dating Alice/Rachael. Discuss.

Ok now that's out of the way and I'll talk about my weekend in San Diego. I left work about 3 p.m. and arrived in San Diego like... 9 p.m. or so. Steve's dad bought the group (being Steve, his mom and dad and the weird friend of his dad that Steve and I did not like) dinner.
Dinner was good but I was exhausted so Steve and I went back to his place and talked then crashed. It was cool though. We had the adult version of the conversations we had in high school. We really bonded again. It was awesome. I'm glad he's my best friend in spite of all the years and different experiences we've had between the two of us.

Then Saturday was spent all day on the Princeton, the guided missile cruiser ship he's on. We got to see a lot of cool stuff such as:
A navigation briefing
A submarine coming into harbor
The USS Reagan aircraft carrier at close range
Helicopters and Prowlers (a plane that engages in electronic warfare) flew by
And my favorite, the combat control center

We also had a "Steel Beach Picnic" which means a BBQ on the ship's helopad. It was fun. A great time was had by all. Steve's dad tried to get me to hit on some cute lieutenant, which annoyed me. I hate when people tell me to hit on women. It really annoys me. Plus I don't get to spend that much time with Steve since he's in the Navy and all. I didn't want to spend a few hours with an (admittedly cute) stranger instead.

That night we went out to dinner at this Italian place on Coronado and it was great. I had a lamb shank and the meat was so tender, I let it melt in my mouth instead of chewing it.. mmmmm. Next morning, we all went to brunch at this cafe near Steve's apt. Awesome Omelette! Following that I hit that road.

Made it back into town around 6. Immediately left for Malone's house for a nerd council viewing of Idiocracy. Great movie. I highly recommend it. It made me laugh. It was depressing. It made me want to have children.

That's the weekend my peoples. Goals for this week: Finish Breakfast Song, Submit Oath of Office to BS Council members, see Rear Window with Rachael.

Keep it real all ya'll.

The Apocalypse and Other Sundry Matters

So it snowed in the Phoenix-area. Snow... in the desert.
I saw it myself too. Driving from my parents to my best friend's parent's house. Snow clearly coming down. I wanted to pull over to the side of the ride and freak out.

Clearly this means the end is very seriously nigh. Should I be sad the world is coming to an end? Did anything really get accomplished? Way to go humanity. We had thousands of years to get something done and instead we drew on cave walls and watched videos in the internet.

Still can't find my DVDs from the move. This is really frustrating. I wanted to watch Rear Window or Philadelphia Story tonight but nooooo! Fuckers!

Weekend matters:
Friday I went with Alice and Rachel to the movies. We saw Pan's Labrynth. I think we all agreed it was quite the enjoyable movie. That makes two for two on good movies I've seen with Alice and Rachel. Three for three if you count the Friday Alice and I saw the new Bond, also awesome. I'm getting perilously close to saying I should only see movies with one of the two or both at the same time. Cause.. so far the record is exemplary.

Saturday I went to my parent's house to pick up laundry my mother insisted on washing for me. I also took Dad to lunch cause he was lying on the couch watching TV. He looked bored. I felt like being a good happy son. We went to a Chase's Diner in Mesa/Chandler. I hadn't been since I lived in Gilbert with the Ex. It was just as good as remember it.

Sunday I was supposed to see Steve and Heather. But dude forgot to tell me he wasn't going to be at his parent's house till later in the afternoon. I arrived at noon and was told by his dad that was the story. So I hung out with his mom and dad for a bit. They're like my second set of parents anyway. Even though they're raging conservatives and sometimes I think his dad wants to kill me cause I'm so liberal, I still enjoy their company and had a good time. I watched the first half of the Bears Saints game and then went to my parents.
Once at my parents, I raided their fridge. I pretty much made a pig of myself which I rarely do. I ate the rest of their ice cream (out of the carton no less), finished the box of English Muffins, had a sandwich, drank a bunch of their milk/water/juice and had some chips. My stomach hurts just reading that.
At five I went back to Steve's to sign the waiver agreeing not to die of a heart attack while partying on a naval vessel. I had to take off quickly though to make Jen's birthday dinner at her house.
Dinner was great. Steak was tasty. We watched Dodgeball afterwards cause it was on. Jen was sick so she was kinda of bitchy/cranky. But I totally understand and know that she gets like that when she's sick. I still had a good time. Even though her house is out in Buckeye and I feel like I should get on a plane to get there.

That's it really. That's the weekend and the apocalypse and other sundry matters. If the world is still spinning and orbiting the sun, I'll be around.

Like the corner of my mind

An ode to my previous home (I like my new place much better but figured it's a good idea to remember what I left)

Oh Park of Hayden
How I will miss
Your many facets

The constant traffic
Both mechanical and pedestrian
Like a polluted stream

The first night; auspicious
The drunk, woman beater upstairs
Shattered the front window

Two cars broken into
In two years
Why steal cell phone accessories?

What better way to wake at 2 a.m.
Then to hear drunken girls peeing
Outside my bedroom window

The Betos, ever present
Greasy taco smells
Greeted me every morning and evening

Goodbye temporary home
I shared with my cold-hearted Ex
May you be burned to the ground
And your foundations salted and radiated
As a warning to future generations

LOL, I think I may be a bit bitter. Or maybe the new place is so cool that the old place really does feel like a place where war crimes were committed.

Stop, collaborate and listen.

I will fill everyone in on the move, of which there is plenty to inform.
But first I have business to take care of on ye olde blog.
My brother Jeff over at IambetterthanU.com tagged me. This means I have to tell five things about myself that most people do not know. Which will be hard. Cause I kinda share the intimate details of my life with everyone. Hence... blog. Anywho, here goes:

1. I was scared of the dark until like sixth grade... maybe even longer. I lost track honestly. It all stems from seeing the movie Poltergeist at age five. Life long trauma people. I just now am capable of watching the crappy sequels without breaking out into flashbacks. Still haven't seen the original all the way through since that first time.

2. I cannot straighten my right arm out all the way. I also cannot touch my right shoulder with my right arm. I broke my elbow in seventh grade in a tragic family tackle football game. My favorite cousin tackled me while I was reaching out with the ball to cross the "goalline" Since Brian was much older and heavier than I and since his entire body landed on my elbow, something had to give. In the process of breaking, a piece of cartlidge slid into the joint of my elbow. Every time I tried to straighten or flex my right arm, the piece of cartlidge would pop up like a door stop, preventing my progress. I had surgery to remove the cartlidge. Now scar tissue is mainly what prevents my full range of motion. Over time it's gotten better but it's still not 100%.

3. I was once quite the accomplished singer. And by accomplished I mean adults would praise Child Head for his pretty voice. My elementary school choir teacher picked me to sing a solo in the Xmas pageant/play/revue. Granted I came down with a brutal case of stage fright and ran away crying. But I got back on the horse and sang. I sang cute little boy solos in almost every elementary school choir performance the school had. Then my voice changed and I just have an average man's singing voice. I mean, I think I sing in tune better than most people. But I'm not going to be trying out for American Idol anytime soon.

4. I was stalked and had my life threatened by a convicted child molester when I was in fourth through fifth grade. The creep started by sending letters to my school to me. The school/teacher was really stupid and gave me the letters without looking at them. They were pretty graphic descriptions of what he wanted to do to me. I was little and didn't really get it thank god. I just knew it was weird. Long story, slightly less long: He kept sending letters, the police got involved, I couldn't go anywhere without an adult with me and I do mean anywhere for about two years. He threatened to kill me (didn't find that out until I was much older). I am always grateful to the post workers who caught him. He was arrested and put on trial for molesting his two nephews and threatening harassing me. I think by this time he's out of jail. If for some reason I ever ran into him in person, I'm fairly certain the amount of rage and violence I would be capable of is close to endless. Thankfully I don't think it scarred me too bad. I don't think about it very often.

5. I've totaled two cars. The first was my little Honda Civic, which I slammed into a parked car. Yeah. A Parked Car. The second was my parent's Ford Aerostar. I was making a left. I checked. I was clear. Then a speeding driver swooped around and smashed into the front bumper of the van. The Fleetwood Mac song, The Chain, was playing at the time. I haven't had an accident since then. I kinda drive like a granny now. Or at least not like a reckless bat out of hell, which is how I drove as a teenager.

Ok who to tag now:
Alice
Rachel
Amanda
Allie (though I don't even know if she reads this blog or keeps up her own blog anymore)
and............
Wynn since Matt Waite passed on tagging him last time.

Posts on the move will be forthcoming. Feel free to harass me if I don't follow through on that.

Once more into the breach

One final post from my soon-to-be former abode. So yup, everything worked out with the new place. Outlaw does not make new roommate break out into hives or watery eyes.

Other events that have happened since then:
My car got broken into. Items stolen include: my work badge, an expired membership card and my charger for my cell phone. Cost to replace my window: $185. Cost to replace charger: $20. Cost to replace badge: $8. They didn't even take my cds... which means they hated my taste in music. Well fuck them!

I finally got a python script to work that will do something cool and useful. Huzzah! Granted it took three days and lots of begging for help from some awesomely generous individuals. But it works! It's alive! I can now download the 2004 presidential results for each county in the US in about 15 seconds or less. ::does the snoopy dance of happiness::

Finished the Star Wars book I bought. It kinda dragged for a while but the last 100 pages or so were awesome. Some seriously dark and twisted stuff. Very heady. I liked it and am looking forwards to the rest of the books in this series.

Rachael burned me the new Decemberists CD and the Wolfmother CD. Wolfmother is fun but not something I would listen to all the time. The good songs though are really good. The Decemberists are amazing. Very confident band. The songwriting is exemplary and I really like the lead singer's voice. I'd like to make a mixed CD of them and Arcade Fire. They're very complimentary I think.

Ok... I'm going to eat but then I have to get packing for the move. I've avoided it as long as humanely possible. Starting with putting old clothes in trash bags to give to Goodwill. Mom and Aunt come over tomorrow to clean. Dad/Jeff/I will be moving the furniture I can't fit in the new place.

Next time: New Head HQ.

Home?

The "Find a Place to Live" search is going well. I looked at a cheap but kinda dingy place on Monday. $500 a month, which is a lot cheaper than what I'm currently paying. It would be a room in a four bedroom condo. I put my foot in my mouth though when I met the owner. She said she had all these papers she needed to file from when she owned her own practice. And since she's younger than me I thought and said out loud, "Oh are you a paralegal?"
To which she replied (and without a hint of piss) "No, I'm a lawyer. A prosecutor actually."

Oh... well don't I look like a sexist fricking jerk. But she's got me all wrong. I'm an ageist fricking jerk. Honest!

Either way, the place was ok but the price was right.

Last night, I looked at a place that was $550 a month. It was also closer to my job which is nice. Less commute=better commute. This place looked amazing though. The room was bigger. It was just really cool. Plus I didn't offend the owner. And the owner likes Buffy and knows some people from my work. Which is great on both counts.

I'm pretty settled on picking the place from last night. I have to bring Outlaw over to the place tonight to make sure the owner isn't allergic. She has a cat but apparently she's allergic to some breeds. She said she would know right away if she was or not. Outlaw better not screw this up for me. Or it's dingy $500 place I go.

That's really all I have for now. I'm stressed out and probably will be till this whole living situation is resolved.

I Have A Hard Time Taking the Easy Way

Sorry for the lack of a hangover post. I think I slept through my hangover. I normally don't sleep in but I didn't get out of bed yesterday until 11 something. Which is definitely sleeping in for me.

So my life is a whirlwind of turmoil right now. I still need to figure out why the fuck Qwest thinks I owe them money even though I canceled my phone service ages ago. Yet another potential living situation fell through. This one really pissed me off. Just to recap:

1) Living with my fiance.
2) Fiance leaves me. Live with my parent for a month while she gets her shit together.
3) She never gets her shit together so I kick her out and force her to move to SF.
4) Living in my apartment which is now just barely affordable by moi.
5) Find an apartment near my job that I can afford cause I'm poor.
6) My brother suggests I move in with him and his GF. We go house/townhouse shopping and everything.
7) Brother tells me the option will no longer work.
8) I find out that I actually am not poor enough to afford the apartment near my job.
9) My cousin tells me a friend of hers from work needs a roommate.
10) I talk to cousin's friend. She is amiable to the idea. Her ex hasn't moved out though so... I have to call her and find out when that occurs.
11) After a week of calling her everyday and becoming more frantic when I haven't heard back from her, I call my cousin. Cousin tells me that her flaky ass douchebag of a friend has decided she doesn't want to live with a guy after all. Fucker. WHY NOT FUCKING TELL ME THAT BY RETURNING ONE OF THE FUCKING CALLS I MADE TO YOUR CELL PHONE!!?!??? JEEBUS!
12) Work on breathing and not going into a murderous rage. Wish I had a metal broom handle to bash into a defunct playground like I used to do when I was a teenager and I got really angry.
13) Sign up on roommates.com cause I've come to grips with the fact that I'm too poor to live alone. Damnit.
14) Place responses to a series of ads. Arrange to see some places today and this week.

So that's where I am right now with finding a roof over my head for me and Outlaw. There's a place I really really want. But because I'm me and because things never work out I won't get that place. Noooo I'll have to live FARTHER away because I have no choice. I wanted to get rid of my commute not make it longer. But at this point I will settle for more money by getting cheaper rent. I refuse to pay more than $500 a month before utilities. Cause otherwise it's not enough of a savings from my current place. This should be possible.
But the place I really want (which, again, I won't get because I'm me and I don't get what I want) is this loft downtown. Right by work. It would be sweet. It was just bought by this guy who travels a lot and just wants someone who he won't have to worry about trashing the place when he's gone and can keep the place up. That's me. But like I said, it's not going to happen. I don't get the things I really want. With the exception of my current job. That was total shit luck though.
Things I've wanted that I don't get to have:
1) Enough money to not be considered poor.
2) A cool apartment near where I work so I don't have to commute a ton.
3) Sex
4) An attractive girl who enojys my company and enjoys sleeping with me and whom I feel the same way about. (heh not going to happen)
5) A Wii.

Feels better to get that out. I think I'll take a shower, brush my teeth, get dressed, throw some laundry in the machine and play FFXII till it's time to check out my first potential new place.

Warning Signs

oooh it's going to be a weird, sad night. I'm drinking all my beer and singing along to Itunes and blogging. There's a lot of bad places this could go. But fuck it. I feel like doing this. Silly self-indulgent behavior.

Go see Children of Men. Fantastic movie. I want see it again tonight but that's really silly behavior.

The fricking phone company is charging me for a service I cancelled two months ago. Fuckers. I'll call them tomorrow and straighten them out.

You know... drinking and singing is a lot more fun when I'm not blogging nonsensically.
See you tomorrow for my hangover post.

Voices in my head

I've spent a lot of time recently thinking about this idea I have for a book. The theme is about reality vs. fiction and how the line is a helluva a lot blurrier than people think. This is especially true lately because of the web.
On the one hand, things like blogs. youtube, facebook, myspace and such give tons of access to the personal and public lives of millions of regular individuals.
On the other hand, how do we know those are actual people, not just made up fictional characters?
Or even fuzzier, how much is person X in every day non-online life similar to person X online? Does person X even know?

And when fiction, reality, and psuedo-reality combine, what's up and down? Black or white? Doesn't the rules for everything go haywire?

There are a few examples of this kind of clash actually occurring. Most recently with Lonleygrl15 on youtube. It was a fake yes. But to the viewer who's not paying hyper-attention to things, it's believable to a degree. After the fakery was revealed, quite a few viewers said who cares that it's fake? It seems real and that's the important part.
::whoa::

Then there's JenniCam. Probably the first 24/hr webcam. Not porn either or at least if that's what people went there for, they would be really bored. It was just some girl and a webcam. On. All the time. Kinda like the Truman Show but without actors. Or was it? Her stated aim for the cam was to just let it run and ignore that it exists. But is that possible? Really? What about everyone who wasn't her that crossed paths with one of her cams? If they knew, can you really forget about it? I dunno. I really don't. I suppose it's possible. Maybe it's like absolute zero. The act of measuring it causes too much heat and makes absolute zero go away.

So what if a group of people decided to create fictional characters but instead of doing a traditional story, movie or tv show, they BECOME the characters. They blog as them. They make video blogs as them. They eat and breathe and sleep as them.

Maybe they have a set period of time every day/week/month where they get together and work on shaping a story. But if the goal is realism within a dramatic construct, it couldn't be too dramatic. At least not for a while otherwise people would see through it. There would have to be some direction to it though. Maybe not though.

Anyway...

What happens to who they were before? What happens to who they are in the act? Could people tell the difference? Could they tell the difference? When do the lives start merging? Or would they always remain separate? And what about shaping of the story? The person/persons doing that would have a lot of power. And they might have to throw in events that some members of the "cast" wouldn't be aware of to maintain spontaneity or fresh, real reactions.

I'm just musing... I need to start writing something. The actual story itself. I want to have a general direction for it though. hmm...ponders....

No tags for this entry until I think some more.